Consider, if you will, a spy movie in which we’re told midway through the movie that all of the twists and turns and intrigue that we’ve been immersed in actually don’t matter at all. What we have instead is the lowest stakes spy movie ever. Keep reading →
Question: why are stoners so fascinated with smoking pot? It’s not exactly cinematic because it’s a relatively dull activity to watch. The audience is kept at a distance during the event because the effects are all mental/chemical: the characters’ viewpoint is altered, but that doesn’t get translated to the viewers–we’re left to guess at what’s happening. Watching people smoke pot on screen is like watching the Food Network with the sound off. It’s like watching someone read a book and not being able to see the words–they’re wrapped up in something happening inside their heads, but all we can do is watch them as they sit there. It’s why there has never been a “nicotine-comedy” film, and the fetishized process looks exactly the same. Ok, I’m sounding like a grouch. There is a good deal of coughing, I’ll give it that.
I fully admit I don’t understand the attraction to stoner comedies–never have been able to sit through a Cheech and Chong movie, and I only like that Bob Saget scene in Half Baked, etc etc–but stoner action movies, which is what Pineapple Express supposedly is, now that’s something different. Pineapple Express, despite feeling slight in many places and a bit overlong, is the funniest movie so far this year, in large part due to James Franco’s performance as the friendly neighborhood drug dealer, Saul.
Sooooo, not sure if you heard, but a few big movies came out this summer. Where were we?
Iron Man is a great superhero movie, so much so that it’s an argument that the genre deserves a place amongst the other guilty pleasure genres like Westerns and Gangster flicks. Everything about it feels fresh, the CGI is some of the best you’ll see, it’s funny and hip, and Robert Downey Jr. doesn’t make anyone look foolish for doing a jig once his casting was announced (well, almost anyone: take off that ridiculous hat). But it’s been out for months now and you’re already like “Why is he talking about it now?” so let’s move on. Keep reading →
“Where are moose and squirrel, Jones?”
You’ve already seen it, so this entreaty will fall on deaf ears. But I will tell you anyway: Save your $8.50 and use it to see Iron Man instead.
There was about half an hour where I wasn’t sure I hated Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull and then…it all just kind of clicked and I realized that I really missed the Nazis. No, seriously. Keep reading →
…attention span is…
What was I saying?
Do you like seeing monkeys perform kung fu to break up expository scenes? Do you like movies that are so excited to get to the next scene that the directors literally show you part of that scene before the first one is finished? Do you like smoking crack? Then go see Speed Racer. I saw it 8 days ago and have just awoken from a serotonin-induced coma brought on by 70s-animation and shitty editing to type out this meager warning: Don’t…go…see…Speed…Racer…but…Christina…Ricci…looks…strangely…hot…in…it.
I didn’t say it was a newsflash. The duo stars in Baby Mama, and actually it’s a little surprising that (1) it took this long to pair them on screen and (2) Lorne Michaels is nowhere to be found (but plenty of SNL & 30 Rock alums are). They have changed very little about their “Fey-as-straight (wo)man and Poehler-as-jester” routine, except when did Fey’s cheek become so … scarless? I spent a chunk of the film playing Where’s Waldo with it. [I'm only slightly ashamed of that.] Anyway, Tina Fey’s signature scar may be difficult to spot, but luckily the same cannot be said for the laughs.
Let’s just get this out of the way: Yes, Jason Segel goes full frontal in the film. Apparently, he’s been watching one too many Harvey Keitel movies. That this much-talked-about scene happens near the beginning actually ends up working well thematically (though probably not intentionally) as it clues the audience in to a key component of this Judd Apatow production: What you will be watching for the next 90 to 120 minutes is purely pornographic. I don’t mean the sometimes-exposed breasts, or the language that not-so-subtly evokes a conversation between truckers over the CB after a cocaine-fueled night at the strip club, or even Jason Segel’s penis. Rather, it is the plot which is pornographic. Consider the steps:
Aah, another charming, droll romantic comedy from across the pond, in the tradition of Death at a Funeral, Four Weddings & a Funeral, and The Englishman Who Went Up A Hill But Came Down For A Funeral… Wait, what? This came from us?? Keep reading →
My friend Jesse was stirred by a little movie in 2004 called Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. It was everything a budding filmmaker could want in a movie: its story line was original, its structure was unconventional, and its director, a little-known French filmmaker named Michel Gondry, de-emphasized special effects in favor of do-it-yourself filmmaking (as much as possible). My same friend walked into Gondry’s 2006 The Science of Sleep with popcorn and soda in hand, as excited to see a film as children are to see Santa Claus. What he got was the yuletide equivalent of socks under the tree. Sure, they were those multicolored socks that Nepalese sherpas wear, but they were socks nonetheless.
I think he’ll be more pleased with Gondry’s latest effort, Be Kind Rewind. With the top-heavy movie cycle, in which box office receipts plummet after the opening weekend, Be Kind is probably already old news. There are a few reasons you should press the rewind button and go see it. The biggest reason: it’s ingenious.
At this point I think it’s safe to say that almost everyone who has seen Cloverfield agrees that it’s a rollicking good time; one of those popcorn movies where every jolt and twist is made all the more enjoyable by watching it in a packed theatre. That in itself is a major marker in our country’s progression beyond September 11th, as Cloverfield is the first movie that asks us to engage the event as drama, unpacked of all of its helplessness and heartbreak. In a way, it resembles the original Godzilla movie, a film that also used a monster as a stand in for a devastating attack. Ultimately, Cloverfield allows us to move forward by accepting 9/11 for what it was: a horrific attack by forces that we could not adequately understand and were powerless to stop.
